<INTERIOR: BUNKER SLUMBER PARTY — MIDNIGHT>
HITLER: Hey Josie, did you hear about ze Fine Bros attempt to Blitzkrieg YouTube?
GOEBBELS: You know I don’t vatch the internets, Ado.
HITLER: Oh, Josie, get vit the times. It’s all the hub-bub on Subreddit Kotaku in Action
Happy to announce that Cyanide & Happiness is trademarking stick figures. If you draw like shit you owe us $20. This is for the community.
— Rob DenBleyker (@RobDenBleyker) January 30, 2016
GOEBBELS: Oh, I missed a sub-sub reddit of Kotaku, so shoot me, Ado.
HITLER: Don’t be such a drama qveen, Josie. You can just ask me und I’ll tell you about it.
GOEBBELS: Fine.
HITLER: Nein! Not fine. Here, just vatch boogie2988/Francis exshplain it.
GOEBBELS: I’m confused. How do ze Fine Bros claim to copyright reaction videos? Didn’t reaction videos pre-date zem? I mean, they didn’t film all ze people around ze world reacting to 2 Girls One Cup…
HITLER: No, Josie, of course zey didn’t. In point of fact, zis is the YouTube’s top viewed video for “reaction video”
GOEBBELS: OMG, I remember zose scary flash videos. You tricked me vit one back during ze Battle of Kursk.
HITLER: I know, I’m awful. There vas just so much down time sitting in ze tanks.
GOEBBELS: Vell, ze vindows movie editor production qvality of this last one leaves someting to be desired.
HITLER: And, dis is where de Fine Bros come in. Dey make zis into a cottage industry.
GOEBBELS: But, Ado, surely just being gut at someting doesn’t mean you own it.
HITLER: Vy not? I’m good at exterminating people — maybe I should copyright dat.
GOEBBELS: Look, no one qvestions that, Ado. But it’s not like Stalin is going to pay you a royalty everytime he executes a dissident.
HITLER: Vell, he should. In fact, I hereby make it a policy of the Reich dat I own de killing of people. And if anyone doesn’t like it, I invade dem.
GOEBBELS: Oy, Ado. Dis is going to be way more trouble den its worth.
HITLER: Summon ze lawyers!
GOEBBELS: Eh, Ado… You sent away ze lawyers.
HITLER: Because dey were Jews…?
GOEBBELS: Yeah.
HITLER: Damnit. I’m awful.
